She says, "My dearest Maxxy~"

Hmmmm.... and she said "You're special to me, I would start again with you, given the chance"... I am flattered. Am I being such a bitch? That, remembering how back then, I depended on you for my happiness. I've put you first in everything I do. Remembering how you treated me... I don't feel so special. You said you made a mistake. But in what I see is, right now it is a mistake, but back then it was not, it was your choice, it was hard to tell you what was wrong between us. I do wish you would make a difference. And when I decided, I can't bear the sorrow that I would leave. You said you would change, one week passed, you never changed. I don't blame you, it was your choice back then. Did you remember "I didn't want you to change for me, I loved you for who you were, all I ever asked for is your tenderness and gentleness." You had your reasons. So that is why it's the past now. Before I gave up, I asked for a chance that you would at least listen to me and what I needed from this relationship. But, I never, got the chance. Many years have passed, you did your best to show me a better you. I admit, you're beautiful now and you are much matured now too. But would this made a difference in how you treat me? Knowing you, I tried. But I can still see similarities to the past. Love would never calculate they say. Yeah, back then, I would gladly die and jump off a building to save you. Did you ask yourself why right now, I am firm with my decision? I was never like that towards you. What made me this person this day, it was your choice. My mission, was to make your life better, so a better "Us" could exist. In every way, I'd gladly neglect the "Me" importance so that a better "Us" would exist. I just want to exist. There are things in my life that I am happy about that I wished to share with you. Do you know how it feels to be brushed off? I left that pain away long ago, should I come back to see if history repeat itself?

I hope you understand, I am not wanting people to tell me how special I was to them. I just wanted the "Us" to exist. Two person in love, doing each other's best to bring the best in life to each other. That is what I believed in. I tried to exist in your life, but my feelings, my desire, and my joy for things in my life, you're not interested in it. Even now, I tell you about my frustrations. You said you believed in me, you said I'm stronger than that. I'm in a tough situation, would you take care of my well being? My lowest moments in life? You never see me through it, because you never stick around long enough to see me suffer my lowest moments. In my past quiet six months, it was low, I tried to brace myself to be stronger. I've been in a relationship like this not too long ago. It's tiring. Would you kindly? If you truly want to make a come back, at least ask yourself. Would you give me a chance to exist to you? When I said "I love you", it meant that I would stick with you till the end of it all. I would be there for you. But do I need to tell you all these in a blog post like this? I don't want to make you feel bad nor pressure you. If it's never your desire, it's understandable. A normal person, who get a pet dog, would take good care of it's well being. If my lover would take good care of my well being, I would be forever hers, even to just be as how she takes care of her pet. I would be loyal, I would go against all odds for her.

"Would you pick me up when I'm at the lowest point of my life?"